
© A. Mac
Lots of haters can't deal with the re-election of Barack Obama ... in Red States all over America, the whining bigots, religionists and ignorant are talking "secession."
I'm for them seceding and, as a retired contract negotiator, language-writer and enforcer, I'll write the SECESSION AGREEMENT ...
Pro f'n Bono!
THE DEAL
Any current STATE belonging to the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA SHALL HAVE THE RIGHT TO SECEDE FROM THE UNITED STATES UPON SATISFACTION OF THE FOLLOWING TERMS AND CONDITIONS.
1) Any/all states petitioning for said SECESSION shall conduct a REFERENDUM OF ITS REGISTERED, ELIGIBLE VOTERS which shall consist of A SINGLE-QUESTION BALLOT WORDED THUS WITH NO MODIFICATIONS OR EXCEPTIONS;
QUESTION: SHALL THE STATE OF _______________________— SECEDE AS ONE OF THE STATES OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA EFFECTIVE AS OF 12:01 AM on the ________— DAY of THE MONTH of _______________, in the year 20__?
2) AN AFFIRMATIVE RESPONSE TO THE SINGLE BALLOT QUESTION OF FIFTY-PLUS PERCENT (50+%) OR GREATER OF THE BALLOTS CAST BY REGISTERED, ELIGIBLE VOTERS, SHALL BE RECOGNIZED ON THE EFFECTIVE DATE and FORWARD BY ANY/ALL GOVERNMENT AGENCIES, FEDERAL, STATE, LOCAL, etc. and ANY/ALL BUSINESS AND OTHER TRANSACTIONS WITH THE SECEDED ENTITY SHALL BE CONDUCTED WITHIN AND WITHOUT INDEPENDENTLY AND WITHOUT LEGAL APPEAL OR RECOURSE REGARDING SUCH BUSINESS and ANY/ALL OTHER TRANSACTIONS.
3) The SECEDED ENTITY as of its EFFECTIVE DATE OF SECESSION WILL HAVE NO LEGAL ENTITLEMENT or CLAIMS TO ANY/ALL SERVICES and/or RESOURCES of the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, its TERRITORIES, ASSETS, POSSESSIONS, etc., nor SHALL IT POSSESS ANY LEGAL STANDING WHATSOEVER TO CLAIM LIABILITY AGAINST SAME.
4) A SECEDED ENTITY MAY SUBSEQUENTLY PETITION THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA FOR REINSTATEMENT BUT NO SOONER THAN TEN (10) YEARS FROM ITS EFFECTIVE DATE OF SECESSION WITH NO GUARANTEED RIGHT TO SUCH REINSTATEMENT; ANY/ALL SUCH PETITIONS SHALL BE TAKEN UNDER ADVISEMENT SOLELY AND WITHOUT EXCEPTION BY THE SITTING MEMBERS OF THE UNITED STATES CONGRESS WHICH, SHOULD IT GRANT REINSTATEMENT, SHALL DIRECT THE UNITED STATES TREASURY DEPARTMENT TO ASSESS THE PETITIONER the SUM OF TEN BILLION ($10,000,000,000) DOLLARS FOR EACH YEAR UP TO AND INCLUDING the REINSTATEMENT (IF GRANTED).
5) The United States DEPARTMENT OF JUSTICE SHALL HAVE SOLE AND COMPLETE DISCRETION AND POWER AS TO THE CONDUCT OF ANY/ALL ELECTIONS REGARDING SECESSION AND that DEPARTMENT SHALL PUBLICLY DECLARE AND VALIDATE THE OUTCOMES OF ANY/ALL SUCH ELECTIONS.
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Good riddance ..